When we witness a person being assertive, speaking up or taking action, we may assume he or she is quite confident or even courageous. But a closer look may give us a different picture. Some people are very assertive on behalf of others yet very unassertive for their own needs and on their own behalf. They may be seen by others as even being quite passive or cowardly and unable to defend themselves. These people will be so assertive for others that they will expose themselves to extremely hazardous situations with little sense of self-preservation. They may see themselves as quite weak.

However, other people display haughtiness and intimidation of others through acting assertive. Their forceful attitude masquerades as confidence and courage. But it is a sham. When such people are confronted with any actual hardship their seeming assertiveness disappears. They back off and have no resources for dealing with significant conflict, discord or adversity. They just like to act assertive to bully others.

How are you assertive?  How do you see others acting assertive?

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