Emotional Conditioning Robs Us of Individuality

Emotionally conditioned reactions are nearly instantaneous. The person responds reflexively and unidimensionally. The reaction is based on unconscious emotional cues. Reality factors are excluded. The person assumes a role that is evoked by the other person in the relationship. This creates a dyad that is fused. This results in a oneness in the relationship. Individuality and autonomy are excluded. Sensitivity, appreciation and empathy to the other person are eliminated. Both people are blind to the harmful impact this creates for both of them. They tend to stay in these destructive dyads, reinforced by family and society, until death. Or, even if they dissolve the relationship through much misery, they go on to repeat the same choices for their future relationships. As a man once told me, “I’ve been married to three different women but to the same person each time.”