Living On Automatic: How Emotional Conditioning
Shapes Our Lives and Relationships
by Homer B. Martin, M.D. and Christine B.L. Adams, M.D.
This insightful nonfiction book offers a groundbreaking new concept of personalities and relationships. We wrote this book for people in mid-life who have questions about what goes on and what causes problems in their most important relationships – whether in dating, marriage or with their children.
Living on Automatic…
* Develop a deeper understanding of yourself and others
*Discover why your relationships are likely to explode later in life, due to your emotional conditioning in childhood.
*Create a new avenue for improving relationships with children, partners, spouses, parents, siblings, friends and co-workers.
Living on Automatic will improve family, romantic, and work relationships and will help you lead a far richer life than you thought you could.
Homer B. Martin, M.D., the primary author, was my mentor. I am a child, adolescent and adult psychiatrist. Together, we have eighty years of combined experience in treating patients of all ages. What we learned about how people relate is not only new but can also be easily grasped. That is why we wrote this book, to share our findings with the world and to help people understand how to transform their relationships. By the time you finish this book, you will know what goes wrong and how to make improvements.
“The beauty of this book is that it goes far deeper than self-help. Martin and Adams show us how to discover who we are, what people we become attracted to, and why. They also give us hope by offering solutions for relationship difficulties.”-- Mary E. Schwab, MD, MA Religion
“Living on Automatic is a welcome guide for the curious, the confused, and the conscientious seeking to understand themselves and the people around them. Breaking new ground in understanding the patterns of the mind shaped in childhood, this book offers direction and hope in our troubled world.”-- Jim Wayne, MSW, BCD
“Martin and Adams present a straightforward and refreshing analysis of your interpersonal behavior and how common difficulties in relationships can be explained and understood. Many case examples enliven the text and include people of all ages, gender/sex pairings, cultures, religions and economic strata. You will gain self-understanding, discover why you respond the way you do in your closest relationships, and what you can do to make changes in yourself.”-- Moshe Landsman, PhD
“Drs. Martin and Adams not only craft a new approach for grasping personality development but they also explain why we act and react in relationships the ways we do. Living on Automatic provides practical strategies for making positive and healthy changes in our most vital relationships with our families, friends, lovers, children, bosses, and coworkers.”-- Jennifer Bell, MSW, LCSW
“A must-read for anyone seeking new ideas and findings about their relationships. The scope and depth of Drs. Martin and Adams’ clinical experience to discover how we manage our relationships with one another is nothing short of mind-boggling. Their work is comprehensive, spanning infancy through old age.”-- James L. Fisher, PhD, Psychologist, author or editor of eleven books
“With 80 years of solid clinical experience behind it, this groundbreaking book illustrates a revolutionary approach to manage your life, your relationships, and gain self-understanding. Martin and Adams’ new discoveries will make a difference in the lives of people who are dealing with substance use disorders.”-- Richard L. “Rich” Jones, MA, MBA, LCAS, CCS, CCDP, CAI
“For most of us, it is far too easy to be unaware of how unaware we are. Dr. Homer Martin did not hesitate to cut across traditional boundaries in order to help people get off automatic pilot and bring a larger degree of intentionality into their relationships. I am grateful that his unique methods in psychotherapy and his innovative approach have made their way into this book coauthored by Dr. Christine B.L. Adams. The reader is assured of many ‘Aha!’ moments in terms of self-understanding and the emotional conditioning that shape our interactions. The book concludes with ‘Steps You Can Take to Diminish Living on Automatic.’ Homer never failed to tell me, ‘There is something we can do.'”-- Ron Higdon, BA, BD, DMin
“Living on Automatic is a life changer if you want to possess authenticity through self-discovery and look deeply into your relationships. If you wonder why you repeatedly marry similar spouses, why you have problems with your children or parents, and why you are unhappy in your closest relationships, you will find answers.”-- Judith R. Milner, MD, M.Ed, Spec. Ed.
“Ever wish you could solve or avoid problematic relationships? If you are willing to do the tough work of self-examination, Living on Automatic will improve your relationships and your life. This book invites you to think deeply about who you are and to discover how to lessen your automatic emotional and behavioral responses to others that create difficulties for you.”-- Carol Clifton, PhD
“With laser focus, Living on Automatic cuts to the crux of the human condition—self-understanding and how we relate to others. Drs. Martin and Adams provide us with a lens and method to begin changing our lives. Want to positively impact your world? Read this book.”-- Kevin Fall, PhD
“A timely new concept simply and eloquently expressed. Drs. Martin and Adams provide a surefire method to help you uncover why you think and act the way you do in life. This is a must-read for those seeking a new avenue for raising children, negotiating relationships and getting out of or avoiding messy relationships that do not work. You will discover how to re-evaluate your emotionally triggered roles and habits and make relationship changes for the better.”-- Homayoun Sadeghi, MD